Always do right. This will gratify some people and astonish the rest... view

By: Mark Twain

A man is never more truthful than when he acknowledges himself a liar... view

By: Mark Twain

Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first... view

By: Mark Twain

Don't let schooling interfere with your education... view

By: Mark Twain

Don't part with your illusions. When they are gone, you may still exist, but you have ceased to live... view

By: Mark Twain

Don't say the old lady screamed. Bring her on and let her scream... view

By: Mark Twain

Don't tell fish stories where the people know you.. view

By: Mark Twain

Apparently there is nothing that cannot happen today... view

By: Mark Twain

If you hold a cat by the tail you learn things you cannot learn any other way... view

By: Mark Twain

I was gratified to be able to answer promptly, and I did. I said I didn't know... view

By: Mark Twain

I was seldom able to see an opportunity until it had ceased to be one... view

By: Mark Twain

A man who carries a cat by the tail learns something he can learn in no other way... view

By: Mark Twain

Ideally a book would have no order to it, and the reader would have to discover his own... view

By: Mark Twain

Grief can take care if itself, but to get the full value of a joy you must have somebody to divide it with... view

By: Mark Twain

I never let schooling interfere with my education... view

By: Mark Twain

If the world comes to an end, I want to be in Cincinnati. Everything comes there ten years later... view

By: Mark Twain

I've never let my school interfere with my education... view

By: Mark Twain

A man's character may be learned from the adjectives which he habitually uses in conversation... view

By: Mark Twain

A person who won't read has no advantage over one who can't read... view

By: Mark Twain

A person with a new idea is a crank until the idea succeeds... view

By: Mark Twain

Action speaks louder than words but not nearly as often... view

By: Mark Twain

All right, then, I'll go to hell... view

By: Mark Twain

If man could be crossed with the cat, it would improve man but deteriorate the cat... view

By: Mark Twain

I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it... view

By: Mark Twain

Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it... view

By: Mark Twain

If it's your job to eat a frog, it's best to do it first thing in the morning. And If it's your job to eat two frogs, it's best to eat the biggest one first... view

By: Mark Twain

He is now rising from affluence to poverty... view

By: Mark Twain

I must have a prodigious quantity of mind.. view

By: Mark Twain

Humor is mankind's greatest blessing... view

By: Mark Twain

I can live for two months on a good compliment... view

By: Mark Twain

Humor must not professedly teach and it must not professedly preach, but it must do both if it would live forever... view

By: Mark Twain

I don't give a damn for a man that can only spell a word one way... view

By: Mark Twain

I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places... view

By: Mark Twain

I have been complimented many times and they always embarrass me.. view

By: Mark Twain

I have made it a rule never to smoke more that one cigar at a time... view

By: Mark Twain

I have never let my schooling interfere with my education... view

By: Mark Twain

I have never taken any exercise except sleeping and resting... view

By: Mark Twain

I make it a rule never to smoke while I'm sleeping... view

By: Mark Twain

I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened... view

By: Mark Twain

What, sir, would the people of the earth be without woman? They would be scarce, sir, almighty scarce... view

By: Mark Twain

We are all alike, on the inside... view

By: Mark Twain

We have the best government that money can buy... view

By: Mark Twain