Scott Adams Quotes

We must develop knowledge optimization initiatives to leverage our key learnings... view

By: Scott Adams

Remind people that profit is the difference between revenue and expense. This makes you look smart... view

By: Scott Adams

Nothing defines humans better than their willingness to do irrational things in the pursuit of phenomenally unlikely payoffs. This is the principle behind lotteries, dating, and religion... view

By: Scott Adams

Normal people... believe that if it ain't broke, don't fix it. Engineers believe that if it ain't broke, it doesn't have enough features yet... view

By: Scott Adams

Most success springs from an obstacle or failure. I became a cartoonist largely because I failed in my goal of becoming a successful executive... view

By: Scott Adams

You can never underestimate the stupidity of the general public... view

By: Scott Adams

There's nothing more dangerous than a resourceful idiot... view

By: Scott Adams

There are very few personal problems that cannot be solved through a suitable application of high explosives... view

By: Scott Adams

Nothing inspires forgiveness quite like revenge... view

By: Scott Adams

Remember there's no such thing as a small act of kindness. Every act creates a ripple with no logical end... view

By: Scott Adams

Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep... view

By: Scott Adams

The only risk of failure is promotion... view

By: Scott Adams

The best things in life are silly... view

By: Scott Adams

The creator of the universe works in mysterious ways. But he uses a base ten counting system and likes round numbers... view

By: Scott Adams

You don't have to be a "person of influence" to be influential. In fact, the most influential people in my life are probably not even aware of the things they've taught me... view

By: Scott Adams

The longer you work here, diverse it gets... view

By: Scott Adams

Let's form proactive synergy restructuring teams... view

By: Scott Adams

One way to compensate for a tiny brain is to pretend to be dead... view

By: Scott Adams

Engineers like to solve problems. If there are no problems handily available, they will create their own problems... view

By: Scott Adams

Free will is an illusion. People always choose the perceived path of greatest pleasure... view

By: Scott Adams

Be careful that what you write does not offend anybody or cause problems within the company. The safest approach is to remove all useful information... view

By: Scott Adams

Informed decision-making comes from a long tradition of guessing and then blaming others for inadequate results... view

By: Scott Adams

Consultants have credibility because they are not dumb enough to work at your company... view

By: Scott Adams

I get mail.. view

By: Scott Adams

I respectfully decline the invitation to join your hallucination... view

By: Scott Adams

If a job's worth doing, it's too hard... view

By: Scott Adams

If there are no stupid questions, then what kind of questions do stupid people ask? Do they get smart just in time to ask questions?.. view

By: Scott Adams

If you have any trouble sounding condescending, find a Unix user to show you how it's done... view

By: Scott Adams

In less enlightened times, the best way to impress women was to own a hot car. But women wised up and realized it was better to buy their own hot cars so they wouldn't have to ride around with jerks... view

By: Scott Adams